We know you secretly want your Scouts to suffer through that 20-mile hike. That is the goal of it after all, right? So, we thought we’d help you out. Here are some tips to ensure that you and your Scouts have the most miserable time of your lives while hiking:
1-Wear really heavy cotton clothes if it’s summer. Dress in a t-shirt and shorts if it’s winter. They’ll be super sweaty or freezing. Either way, it’s not going to be comfortable! Make sure to avoid layers and covering skin.
2-Don’t take any breaks. At all costs, leave the slowpokes behind.
3-Only tell your two-year-old child where you’re going. We’re confident she’ll forget that you are supposed to return at 6 PM. Then, not only will it be miserable for the troop, but you’ll be sure to create a horrible experience for all the concerned parents as well!
4-Do not use insect repellent or sunscreen. Also, don’t use deodorant. Not only will you be stinky and burnt, but natural human fumes (like sweat) attract the bugs.
5-Pack lots of chocolate and milk. Better yet, don’t pack any food or water! Because everyone loves melted chocolate in their trail mix.
6-Go on a stormy or rainy day. Don’t let anyone bring ponchos or extra layers or it might be slightly less awful.
7-Stray from the trail. This leads to all kinds of terrific problems.
9-Avoid hiking boots. Flip-flops are better. Flip-flops make it really tricky when you’re trying to climb over rocks and such.
10-Find a really busy hiking location, so you can hit all the crowds.
If you want to be miserable while hiking, these are the best tips to follow. Your boys will probably never want to go on a hike again. Mission accomplished!
All joking aside, these things really happen while hiking (I’ve experienced a few of them), and avoiding these issues encourages safety and fun.
Do you have any great suggestions on how to make a fun experience awful?